Sometimes writing can be a chore. This is an odd thing to admit to for someone who has based every decision he has made over the past five years on his ability to write, but it's true all the same. At the end of a day's work when you've already used your one good idea up, it can be a little challenging to sit down and write anything worth reading. It can be challenging to write anything at all.
"HELLO WORDS, ARE YOU IN THERE?" I will shout at my head, forgetting momentarily that my head and my mouth belong to the same being and hoping that one can trigger the other into some sort of action. It rarely does. Useless, useless mouth. You only ever get me into trouble! Yet still, despite me not knowing if I am capable of writing, a part of me still desperately wants to do it. It's like when I see a really attractive girl. I know that she is massively out of my league, I know that she is the Manchester City to my Braintree Town, I know that she will almost certainly reject my advances but weirdly, none of that stops me from going over and saying, 'Hey girl, you wanna bit of this?'
There may be another reason why they often say no.
It's my persistence, and quite likely my ignorance to the facts, that keep me going. Yes, my body may be tired, my mind might be running low on fuel and my eyes might be so sick of the sight of a computer screen that they want to jump out and kick it right in the cursor, but if I don't act on the urge I won't sleep and then what? The cycle goes on forever until I die.
Dead.
Finished.
In the future, when I'm a super respected writer with a tonne of bestselling novels under my belt, I will look back on times like these and laugh. "Ha ha ha!" I will say, mocking my former self over my inability to do something so basic as a blog post. "I have written a 100,000 page epic based on the interior monologue of a sparrow now, former me, what did you ever achieve other than mediocrity?!?"
Well, future, cockier me, it's these struggles that will make you possible, and if that doesn't work at least I'll be able to go to bed on time. That might not make distant future me a reality, but it will certainly make the me of tomorrow a lot cheerier.
