Quite a lot has happened in my last year,
So much I thought I'd write about it for you all here.
I know you'll be grateful, I figured you'd be glad,
You all secretly love this crap even when it's this bad.
So yeah, twelve months ago I was sat in a bar,
Having coffee with a girl (it didn't go that far)
My plans didn't really go past not looking like a prat,
But somehow she found a way to resist so I guess I failed with that,
Then suddenly I changed, turned into someone new,
My ego inflated, no end to what I thought I'd do,
People started praising me and I got really set,
Obviously the wise move would be to stick with that, except...
My ambition got the better of me, my bank balance looked quite low,
So screw this life, I thought to myself, down south is where I'll go!
I packed my bags, filled up a car, got a flat off Spareroom,
The rent looked steep but that didn't matter, I'd be living the high life soon.
Moved in, got two new flatmates, really missed the last,
These two were a bit odd and refused to watch Vampire Diaries when I asked.
My job wasn't what I'd hoped for either, though I did get quite a bit of free beer,
Only passed out on the Underground once which is nowt compared to here.
Went to Isle of Wight, got PAID to tweet about bands,
Some lad from Rudimental spilled his cider on me, grand.
Drove back with two stoned snapper who'd been there to shoot the show,
They could barely see their own hands let alone where we should go.
But all half decent, sometimes, things have to come to a stop,
So I packed that in and came back up North, took a rather dramatic salary drop.
Thought I could make it on my own, which I might do, we'll see,
Clearly not there yet, still got this old Dell upon my knee.
There's a whole new year to figure out what I'm going to try and do,
Probably more crap like this, it's fun for me AND you!
Twelve months on from where I started, I'm not sitting having drinks,
Instead I'm writing shoddy poems, pimping them out with Twitter links.