My aunty liked my hair which was nice until I realised that she's 64 and that I'd actually prefer her not to like it to enhance my own belief that it's cool and young and stuff.
My cousin's man friend had a torch specifically designed to help light up menus in darkly lit restaurants. I vomited in his face over the ridiculousness of it all.
My gran told me, again, that I'm her favourite, whilst my sister was sat right there. This did not disappoint me or my gran, but may have hampered my sister's happiness. Never mind.
I told my cousin's sinfully boring man friend (who had just finished ridding his face of ridiculousness induced vomit) that, whilst he was getting up at 5am the next day (a fact he was bragging about to try and impress us) that I would be fast asleep and not paying council taxes.
I would, however, be living off a student loan that his said council taxes helped to fund. I thanked him for this then sucked the vomit back up just so I could once again spew it in his ridiculous face.